Everyday hacks to be your best self
Russell Peters is one of the funniest comedians I know of, and he’s Indian too– who would of thought? Anyway, my friend had sent me this great 45 minute clip of Peters doing his bit, and I promise you, it is the funniest thing you will see all day.
So park yourself down for 45 minutes and watch this clip; I guarantee you’ll love it!
Russel Peters Clip
(oh by the way, it’s a .ram file, meaning you need RealPlayer to view it)
Imagine a justice system where every time a crime is committed, you had to gather your things, put your jacket on, drive over to the local police station, and prove your innocence. Sounds like one of those apocalyptical fictional stories found only in Hollywood, or in Orwell novels. In fact, we pride ourselves as models of justice with our hackneyed dictums like �innocent until proven guilty� or �guilty beyond a reasonable doubt�, and of course our enforcement of those inalienable rights that require warrants, and sound reasonable cause before any indictments. But are there exceptions ? If the evidence for a crime was not as forthcoming, and the resulting set of possible suspects included the entire population of a town, or a state, or the entire country, are we still following these creeds? The notion of �innocent until proven guilty� just may be a little to idealistic to be practically applicable.
This question has come up in light of the DNA sweep that is being performed in a town in Cape Cod Massachusetts. In an effort to identity the suspect responsible for the murder of Christa Worthington–an investigation that has been ongoing for 3 years now, investigators have asked all 790 male denizens of the town of Truro, to provide samples of their DNA so that it may be compared with–what forensics believes– is the DNA sample of the suspect. In essence, they�re asking the entire male population of this town to �prove� their innocence�provide a DNA sample to be removed from the list.
fair? Ummm… no.
Here�s the news story if you want to read more.
You got to give it to him. Dubya has a knack for appointing high-ranking officials. Now that most of the cast involved in Act I of the Bush Administration have pushed and shoved their way in line, handing over papers of resignation, Bush is trying to reshuffle the cards and in the process– spilling the deck all over the table.
First blooper, a replacement for Sec. Tom Ridge of Homeland Security with Bernard Kerik, the former NYC Police commissioner. And of course, turns out this guy has a messy criminal record with indictments of conspiracy, an FBI probe for alleged fraud, and various acts of infidelity not quite the unadulterated record we’re looking for in such a high appointment. Needless to say, Kerik has withdrawn from the nomination.
Second blooper, the replacement of Attorney General John Ashcroft; you may remember him from such works as “The Patriot Act” and “Liar Liar”. And for this replacement, the Bush administration nominates Alberto Gonzales, a former White House council that has been intimately tied to prisoner abuse scandals in Abu Garib. Another Swing and a miss.
Well, so far he’s 0-2. My question is: how much longer till a Supreme Court Justice appointment?
Let the recounts begin!
Although recounting the votes will never change the results of the past presidential election, certification of the election results is absolutely necessary. It may seem fitting for the sore loser to wallow over the final score, fret over the bad call, ostracize the interfering fan, and churn up a deluge of “what if’s” and “should of’s”, and although the timing of the situation may seem to be in favor of this assessment, I don’t feel this is the motivating factor behind these recounts. Even if things miraculously turn up different during this recount, if we find that John Kerry may have actually won Ohio, there is no way an ostensibly disinterested and republican-owned congress would certify any one less than George Bush as President; and I think many wrongly consider the re-counts as a ray of hope in such an abdication. John Kerry formally stated that he was not participating in the recount, not to be misunderstood as deprecation, but done primarily to discredit this misinterpretation that democrats have called for this action as a last ditch efforts to usurp Dubya.
The acutal goal of the recount is to bring to light a clear problem in our election process, particularly with the shortage of voting machines and of miscounted absentee ballots, both happening to appear in Ohio, a critical state in this election. I think the goal is that in going forward, for future elections, if these issues in our election process are not addressed now, we may run into the dire predicament where the wrong candidate comes out winning the election. Take election 2000 (Gore/Bush) for example (I’m not bitter–okay, maybe a little).
Seeing that I am knee-deep in winter vacation, rare are the mornings that I’m up early enough to listen to one of my favorite morning radio programs, Howard Stern. But those days are now behind me, but not by choice. Citadel Broadcasting, the media conglomerate that owns the RI stations that air Howard Stern (106.3,102.7,103.7) have pulled the plug on Howard’s 4 hour morning show.
As sad as it is, there is some sense in this decision. Howard certainly does plug his scheduled move to Sirrus Satellite radio quite frequently, and if these radio listeners start purchasing satellite radios, they would probally never listen to regular radio ever again. Also, the timing is right, if we in providence don’t hear Stern, we may eventually forget about the show and forget about his move to satellite radio, and may just continue to live life as before, somewhat-satisfied with our AM-FM receivers–and continue to daze through the bromide of overplayed and tired commercials indicative of damn terrestrial radios. It is the right move for Citadel, but it is still a sad thing for Howard Stern fans.
This is just one of those instances where the decision of a company runs contrary to the wishes of their consumers.
Never has a tragedy hit home so personally as the earthquake and tsunami of this week. The home my family and I left 19 years ago, Sri Lanka, has been singled out as having been significantly affected. To all those that have asked and expressed concern regarding the condition of my family members still residing in Sri Lanka, I’d like to inform you that they are safe and have, by God’s mercy, survived the devastation.
But, as you all know, there are tens of thousands that were not as fortunate. Our prayers and condolences go out to all the victims of this tragedy. If you�d like to help out in someway, please follow the links below. Sri Lanka, as well as most of the countries there in southern Asia are desperately poor, even before the Tsunami, and any bit of support–I am sure–will go a long way.
Sri Lanka Relief
Red Cross Resonse Fund (Thanks Dave)
Every Tuesday afternoon, at about 1:30, I can usually crack open my front door, stick my arm out and feel for the latest TIME magazine. And, of course being that time-of-year, specifically the week before the New Year, TIME does its “Person of the Year” and guess who is smack dab on the cover–Dubya!
Yes, President Bush is Person of the Year, according to TIME. But, no need to cancel your subscription just yet. The way they figure out who is person of the year, isn’t entirely subjective, and it’s not always meant for accolades, although you could look at that way. It’s determined by who has been in the News the most the past year, the famous and infamous, and you can’t deny the fact that Dubya has had a headline or two pretty persistently, and not always for honorary reasons. And to any liberals out there, you may take comfort in the fact that 4 years ago, when TIME was to determine, Person of the Century, they were actually considering Hitler. But, in keeping with political correctness, and staying off their own covers, they went with the more Innocuous Einstein instead– a reasonable choice.
But this year, with Dubya, and keeping with my suspicious nature, I think there could have been a splash of agenda involved with this final decision. This year’s election has been said to have two big losers, Democrats and the Media. Democrats for obvious reasons, and the Media, since some bias reports put their objectivity into question. Perhaps TIME was hoping for a way to absolve themselves from this stigma? Perhaps.
Either way, Person of the Year, I can understand it.
I’ll be the first to admit it, IT guys are arrogant. I can’t explain it; they just are. I think it may be the apocryphal notion that computer guys are smart, sometimes even dubbed as “geniuses”. Maybe this has got to our head? I’m lazy. I’m terrible at math. I sometimes spell ‘cake’ with a ‘k’, but I can probally fix your computer. Ergo…
I caught myself being that guy last night…
Sister: How do I do that thing again on the computer? You just did it so fast and left. I couldn�t follow.
me: man, you’re terrible with computers.
Mother: He never teaches me anything. Why can�t you teach me to use Excel?
me: Mom, you can�t ask a programmer to teach you to use computers. They’re too intimately involved with them. It�s like � hmm, how can I explain this without sounding arrogant. It�s like � Alright, suppose your lost in the city and you’re looking for a particular street, you’re not going to go ask the Mayor for directions are you?
Okay! bad example.
One day I was looking for naked pictures of former attorney general Janet Reno on Google, and I clicked on this link that seemed promising. Lo and behold, about 20 windows started to pop-up, one after another. I’d close one, two more would appear, asking me to install things, and I kept saying “no”. And not the polite “no”, it was the loud and colorfully languaged “no�. Then, after clicking “no” about a dozen times, and seeing that the sea of questions were no way relenting, I did the vulcan live long and prosper on my keyboard to get it to just terminate my web browser. But, it was too late. After I restarted my computer, all of sudden it had become a nesting ground to a gross brood of various new programs that surreptitiously installed itself –like “Bargain Buddy”, and “Cool Web Search”, oh, and the ever popular and bitch to remove “Home Search Assistant”.
I was mortified by this. I think it irks computer science guys even more when stuff like this happens to them–because (arrogantly) we’re better than this. Anyway, today I finally got rid of all my spyware, without having to reinstall windows. I had one particularly pernicious one that couldn’t be removed by conventional means and proved to be quite disabling. It caused my AIM to crash, and slowed my computer down significantly; it went by the name “Home Search Assistant”.
If anyone has this listed on their “Add/Remove” programs list, and having trouble removing it, there is a great step-by-step tutorial online here that will help you out.
Anyway, I finally went Mozilla Firefox all the way now; you won�t catch me dead using Internet Explorer. I recommend you do the same if you happen to like your computer– download it: www.getfirefox.com
FYI: I was obviously kidding about looking for naked pictures of Janet Reno
(It was really for Ruth Ginsberg )
I remember as a kid growing up, having to be woken up ever morning at 6:45 for school. I remember being dragged out of bed, kicking, screaming, pleading, begging, for just 5 more minutes of sleep as though a mere 5 more minutes would be all I need to be somersaulting out of bed. If the begging didn’t work, I’d perk my ears out, trying to hear the patter of the shower, an occupied shower usually guaranteed at least 5 more minutes of sleep. A nod of acquiescence and I’d drop my head on the pillow, curl up, fetus-like, and as soon as I got comfy BE WOKEN UP SINCE FIVE MINUTES WERE UP. Ah, yes, what a miserable hour that “6:45” is. I’d then drag myself in the bathroom, to be even more depressed looking at the bathroom window. How can it still be dark out? Where am I, the moon? What sick maniacal joke is this, and who are the misanthropes that decided school should start so damn early?
Now here I am, in my last years at college, bit*hing about 10’o clock courses–fists in the air and grunting that their “too damn early”. But I think I’m alone on this one. Everyone I talk to, unless their lying (which is a reasonable explanation) asserts that they have no trouble getting up in the morning. Maybe I’m missing something. Maybe there is a certain quantity of hours set for every individual that you can’t exceed, or be delinquent of, to be able to jump out of bed in the morning, grinning like Bob from the Enzyte commercials. You know, Bob, the Once-a-Day tablet for natural male enhancement? –Don’t look at me like that!
I still haven’t figured out my optimal sleep amount, but one thing is certain, it’s not 11 hours. I had 11 hours last night and I’ve been a walking zombie all day. It’s not 8 hours either, that’s my average amount, and my eyelids still fall like guillotine blades.
So the question is: my optimal amount of sleep, does it fall in between 8-11 hours? Does it even exist? Or is it just a pipe dream.